Don't Go Gently Into That Good Night (Because We Won't Let You)
by StoneyT456
Summary: James T. Kirk was a lot of things. A captain. A friend. A son. A brother. Dead. That last one McCoy was having a hard time dealing with. And he was doing everything in his power to fix it. In other words, a series of one-shots in the perspectives of the Enterprise crew and how they deal with the loss and then revival of their beloved captain. SPOILERS FOR INTO DARKNESS!
1. McCoy

**I DO NOT OWN STAR TREK, ALL CHARACTERS AND STUFF BELONG TO OTHERS. THAT GOES FOR ALL CHAPTERS.**

 **Hey there y'all! First Star Trek fic! Basically this is a series of one-shots about how each character deals with Jim's death. Each chapter starts a week after he dies and ends after they talk to him for the first time. The chapters will be McCoy, Spock, Sulu, Checkov, Scotty, Carol, and finally Uhura. Then, depending on the stats, it will either go into the year gap between him waking up and the speech at the end of Into Darkness, or if the time is right, I will end it. Okay? Alrighty then! Reviews are always welcome and please follow or fave if you can.**

 **And off we go:**

James T. Kirk was a lot of things.

A captain.

A friend.

A son.

A brother.

Dead.

That last one McCoy was having a hard time dealing with.

And he was doing everything in his power to fix it.

The transfusion itself was a tricky process. One that he wasn't sure he was going to be able to do. Sure he told Uhura and Spock that he could do it, but he was guessing every step of them way. He had never brought someone back from the dead before.

'Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor not a miracle worker.'

A smile faded on his lips. It had been a week. A whole week and his best friend was still lying still on the bed. Jim was always an antsy patient, always moving and fiddling with something. But seeing him so still, well, it was just a reminder of how close they came to losing him.

Hell, they had lost him.

It wasn't a close call, it was the call, the call that his best friend was dead, dead saving the entire ship. It was a very Jim thing to do, and McCoy had to admit, that if there was one way for his friend to go, it would be saving the x number of people still alive on the Enterprise.

The thing that really got to McCoy, the thing that bothered him the most, is that after Jim had died, McCoy realized that Jim hadn't got a checkup since the whole incident. With nothing better to do, McCoy thought about how many times he failed his friend in the past two weeks.

He hadn't checked up on him when Pike died. He let him alone to sulk and even when he had seen him hadn't gotten around to doing a proper medical examination.

After he got back from Kronos he hadn't looked him over. There wasn't the time. He knew that if he were talking to Spock he would say that his thinking was illogical, there was no opportunity for him to be checked out. But McCoy didn't care. He had freaked when Jim came back initially, seeing the boot print on his face and the slight off way that he walked. But there had been no time.

He also never got time to check on him after his fight with Khan. He had listened to Uhura recall what she saw on the bridge when Khan hailed the ship to trade.

The next time he saw his friend was in a body bag.

That was the worst of it, not being with him through all of that, and then not being with him when he died. He understood that Spock was called. He really truly did. But that didn't mean that it didn't hurt like hell to think that he hadn't been there with his friend through any of that.

Jim denied his help after the issue with Harrison-Khan-whoever he was but he should have pushed harder, tried harder. Instead he is left to deal with his failure as he sits next to the bed side of his halfway dead best friend.

"Doctor, how is the captain doing?" Spock interrupted his thoughts. No matter how much he teases the Hobgoblin, he had to admit that he was being a great friend to Jim. He was not sure if that was because he had seen him die or what, but every day he had been to see Jim.

"His vitals are the same as they were yesterday. Which I guess is a good thing, considering." McCoy said pretending to need to look at Jim's stats to answer Spock. In truth he had those all memorized.

"That is good. Is there anything that I can do to assist you?" He asked.

"Not that I can think of but thank you for the offer, Spock."

"Can I offer you some respite? Perhaps you would like to go get yourself some rest and I shall stay here with the captain?"

"No. I'm good."

End cycle. That conversation has been replayed for seven days now. Each day Spock asking McCoy if he needs rest, and each day him saying no. It was an unspoken agreement between the two men that even though they knew what the other would say, they needed some normalcy in their lives.

McCoy broke the awkward silence. "How are you and Uhura doing?"

"Lieutenant Uhura and I are doing quite well. Might I ask how your daughter is doing?"

McCoy tried to hide his surprise. He never told Spock about his family but he should have assumed he knew. "She is doing fine. Misses her Uncle Jim." McCoy said.

"We all miss him as well."

Spock stayed for a little while after that, but not much longer. Leaving McCoy to his thoughts once again.

It had been a long night for McCoy and the medical staff at Starfleet. Jim had had a reaction to one of the drugs they were using. It would have been no big deal, if he hadn't of been dead a week and a half ago. He was still week, and the reaction about pushed him over the edge. McCoy ensured it didn't, however and soon Jim was back to what he was now, unconscious.

McCoy blamed himself for the incident of course. Even though he had no way of knowing. It wasn't in Jim's medical file. But still, he blamed himself.

They had no way of knowing if this was going to be a setback for his recovery or not. But McCoy being the pessimist that he is, had to assume it would. There was no telling when or if Jim would ever wake up.

But he was willing to wait as long as it took.

And he was not the only one willing to wait.

He got visits from not only Spock, but also other members of the Enterprise as well.

Sulu came by twice. Once y himself and another time with his family. He wanted them to meet the man who saved his life.

Checkov stayed by his side until McCoy kicked him out. The kid needed rest and honestly he was freaking McCoy out. He consistently asked questions about Jim's condition, driving McCoy nuts. He still contacted Bones once a day in order to make sure that his captain was okay.

Scotty had been by once. He was feeling guilty of couse. He walked in to see Jim and started tearing up. He told McCoy to contact him if anything changed with Jim's condition and he left.

Carol had stopped by a couple times but she was also dealing with the loss of her father. And the fact that he was a psychopath. At first she thought that we wouldn't let her see Jim, because of her dad, but McCoy assured her that she was always welcome, the sins of her father do not condemn her.

Uhura had yet to visit. She had messaged McCoy to update her on his condition.

McCoy figured that she would come around eventually, but for now, he was alone.

It had been two weeks. Two. Damn. Weeks.

McCoy needed something. He had been getting, at best, four hours a sleep at night and he needed some encouragement. Some hope that soon Jim would wake up. Something.

Spock had come for their normal routine. But instead of the normal dialogue, they were interrupted by the sound of heavy breathing from the bed. McCoy rushed over to the screen to look at Jim's vitals and when he turned back, a pair of bright blue eyes were staring back at him.

He was overjoyed. He wanted to give him a big hug and hold onto him and never let go. Scared that if he did, he would disappear. Instead, he took a page from Spock's book and decided that that was not the most 'logical' thing to do. So instead he put on a pokerfaced and said

"Oh don't be so melodramatic. You were barely dead. It was the transfusion that really took its toll. You were out cold for two weeks."

The fact that McCoy was saying this to his best friend made him one of the happiest people alive in this moment. But the fact that he was playing it off so nonchalantly also hurt him a little.

"Transfusion?" Kirk asked still visibly exhausted.

"Your cells were heavily radiated. We had no choice."

"Khan?"

'Yeah and thank God for that psycho's blood.'

"Once we caught him I synthesized a serum from his…" he looked for the right words," super-blood." Now for the important questions.

"Tell me are you feeling homicidal? Power-mad? Despotic?"

"No more than usual. How'd you catch him?"

"I didn't."

'But I wish I had.'

Jim looked at Spock and smiled.

Damn. McCoy missed that smile.

"You saved my life."

McCoy feigned hurt. "Uhura and I had something to do with it too you know."

Jim raised an eyebrow at him.

Spock spoke up. "You saved my life captain and the lives of the Enterprise-"

He was interrupted.

He never thought he would be as glad as he was to be interrupted.

"Spock. Just… thank you."

"You are welcome, Jim."


	2. Sulu

**Hey guys! Thanks for the reviews! I know this is really fast to have a chapter up but school was cancelled because of a hurricane warning so I had the time to get this in. The next chapter should be in by Monday. This one is in Sulu's perspective. One thing I need to clear up before you read. Yes, it is canon that Sulu has a husband/partner, so I am gonna write it that way. That being said, I have no clue what his name is so I had some creative liberty there so don't get mad if I missed something or if they tell us it later on. His daughter is in the Original Timeline so I just used her name. Please let me know what you think in the reviews and remember to follow or fave!**

 **And we're off:**

Hikaru Sulu was definitely someone whose respect you had to earn. He will obey command as well as the next guy, but to him, respect has to be earned, not just given.

His respect for Captain James T. Kirk was earned when he jumped off a drill to save him on the off chance his shoot might work.

As far as Sulu was concerned, that was one hell of a way to get his respect.

After following him through missions at the helm, he also saw how he was a great captain. Especially under pressure.

He had trusted the Captain with his life.

Which is why he took it so hard when he died.

He and the captain had never been drinking buddied per se, nor had they been super tight on the ship, but that didn't mean that Sulu didn't respect the hell out of him. And yes, he cared about him. Even if he didn't show it.

Being at the helm let him see things that other crew members didn't see. Like when Marcus was about to blow the Enterprise out of the sky, and Kirk was prepared to offer everything and blame himself. Or when Khan had Jim on the other ship and was demanding a trade. And Jim still tried to save them.

There had been other, more subtle things that Jim had done to earn Sulu's respect. His vast knowledge of the Enterprise and its inner workings, even though he technically didn't have to know these things to be captain.

The way that sometimes on his off time he would chat with other members of the crew or help with repairs even though he didn't have to.

The way that when Sulu or Checkov made a mistake he would never act condescending towards them like others had, instead he would work with them or joke about it.

His willingness to do what needed to be done, even though it might cost him his life.

Also his ability to do all that while looking bad ass impressed the hell out of Sulu.

And then he goes and dies for the entire ship.

No one directly told Sulu or the rest of the members on the bridge at first. The first clue Sulu had to the fact that something was terribly wrong was when the ship suddenly was fixed. Sulu didn't believe in miracles, so there must have been something done to fix it.

And then engineer Scott called Spock down to engineering with a broken voice and he knew it was bad. Uhura left shortly after Spock did, and next thing he knew, they were hailing for McCoy and putting the captain in a body bag. That had been tough on Sulu.

Even if he didn't show it.

Sulu made it a point to visit Kirk in the hospital at least once. But he decided to go the extra mile and invite his family with him too. His little family of three that he held so dear.

McCoy, no surprise was there with Jim when Sulu and his family arrived.

"Doctor McCoy," Sulu said," I would like to introduce you to my family. This is my daughter Demora and my husband John."

John shook hands with McCoy, but Demora still hid behind John's leg. McCoy bent down to see her.

"Hey there little one." He said in a tired voice. "How old are you?"

Demora held up three little fingers.

"Three? You know I got a little girl at home who is five. You and her should meet up sometime, would you like that?"

Demora nodded her head yes and Sulu couldn't help but smile. Even though McCoy has been through hell and back, he still takes the time to talk with his daughter, another man he respects.

Sulu breaks the silence. "I wanted them to meet the Captain. He saved my life. Twice. I owe him a lot."

"Sulu, you know that you owe Jim nothing." McCoy said looking at Sulu.

There was an awkward silence between the two men but Demora broke it.

"Is this the man that saved the ship, daddy?"

"Yeah, sweetheart. It is?"

This time Demora looked at McCoy.

"Is he a superhero?" she asked.

"Sure is." McCoy responded with a smile.

"Can you tell me about him?" She asked.

And McCoy did. He told her stories about Jim at the academy, about how he cheated. He made sure to mention that cheating was NOT the right thing to do, much to Sulu and John's amusement.

"Well, I hate to interrupt but we have to get going. There is a diner at my parent's house tonight." John said apologetically.

Sulu looked at his watch. "Oh shi-"he stopped looking at Demora. "Shoot. We better get going. Thanks for letting us see him, McCoy."

"Please, start calling me Leonard. We've been through too much for you to call me anything else."

If that wasn't the truth.

"Please stop by again if you can. All this talking will hopefully get Jim up again." McCoy said as he led them to the door.

"Will do. Thanks again," Sulu hesitated as if trying the word out for the first time "Leonard."

It was two days before Sulu stopped by again.

"No family this time?" McCoy asked.

"Dem has a dance practice and John is working. Thought I would come by and see how he is doing."

"Same as before." McCoy sighed. "There has been no change at all. I don't even know if he'll have brain damage when he wakes up. For all I know he could have experienced memory loss or something crazy like that. With his luck, I wouldn't put it past him."

"I'm sure he'll be okay." Sulu said not sure what else to say.

"I wish I had your optimism."

"If there was anyone I would bet money on coming back from the dead, it would be the captain."

Leonard nodded his approval. "He is too stubborn to stay dead. If he doesn't want to go, he won't go."

There was an unspoken silence between the two men. "Did I ever tell you the time he saved my life?"

McCoy looked like he was thinking. "I don't think so. Tell me about it. I could use a distraction."

"So we were on the planet Vulcan on the drill. Kirk and I manage to fend off Nero's men, but in the process I lost my shoot. I don't think it is a big deal, until they pull the freaking drill up."

McCoy smiles.

"So, there I was without a shoot, and I go tumbling off the edge of the drill. Before I go, I get one look at Kirk. I yell out his name and next thing I know, I'm falling and he's swan diving off the damn drill to get me. He doesn't think about whether or not his shoot with hold the two of us, which it didn't by the way, he just jumps off thinking that there is a chance of saving me. Someone who he had never met before that day. Checkov managed to beam us aboard but if he hadn't." Sulu stopped and shook his head. "I was so panicked during the fall that I couldn't speak. If Kirk hadn't been there to message the Enterprise…. Let's just say I wouldn't be here."

McCoy looked at Sulu. "Damn. That is one hell of a story."

"All I did was say thanks and you know what he said. He said 'don't mention it'. Like it was something he did all the time, throwing himself off drills high in the air to save strangers. That was the day I knew I could trust him with my life and I respect the hell out of him."

"That is the thing about Jim." McCoy said. "He is not afraid to risk his life to save another's. Or the entire Enterprise." He said.

Sulu nodded.

"He has the survival instinct of a freaking fly." McCoy grumbled making Sulu laugh.

The two men talked for a little bit and then eventually Sulu left.

It was about four days later when he got the call that Kirk was awake.

He got his family together and once again, the three of them were about to set foot in Jim Kirk's hospital room.

But then they heard the glass break from inside and a yell from one very pissed off doctor.

"Damnit Jim! You need to take this!" McCoy yelled.

"Look Bones, I'm telling you, I don't need that!" Kirk said back. He did not have the energy to yell yet.

"Yes you do you corn-fed imbecile! You died two weeks ago!"

"But I'm not dead now!" Jim said back.

It was at this point that Sulu entered earning a huge grin from his captain.

"Sulu!" He said. "It is good to see you!"

McCoy then left the room muttering something but the only words McCoy was able to get out were 'damn child' and 'hyposray his ass' making Sulu grin.

"Is this your family?" He asked.

"Yes. This is my daughter Demora and my husband John."

"Well hello there little one!" Kirk said mentioning to Demora.

And just like that, Kirk, Demora, John and Sulu engaged in conversation. They were talking for about an hour when McCoy came back in.

"The doctor said that you are a superhero!" said Demora.

"Did he now? Do you think I'm a superhero Demmy?" Kirk asked with a smile.

"Yes!" She responded. "When I grow up, I wanna be in Starfleet like you and daddy." She said.

"That is great!" Kirk said looking over at Sulu.

"I hate to cut this short, but Jim needs to get some sleep." McCoy said.

Both Jim and Demora let out simultaneous 'awes'.

"Come on Dem. Thank you Jim. Hopefully we can meet up later?" John said.

Kirk gave a nod. Sulu could tell that he was getting tired and was worried that they had pushed him too far.

"Well, I guess I will see you later Sulu." Kirk said yawing.

"Before I go," Sulu said. "Thank you. Not just for saving the entire ship, but back on Vulcan. I owe you my life."

"Don't mention it." Kirk said with eyes half open. "Although, if you can somehow sneak me some decent food or a beer I would be eternally thankful." Kirk said earning a stern glance from McCoy.

"I'll see what I can do." Sulu said smiling.

"Thanks buddy." Kirk said.

Then he closed his eyes and fell asleep.

 **That's the end! Don't forget to review. If I messed anything up please let me know!**

 **~StoneyT**


	3. C Marcus

**Yes! I uploaded! Okay so this chapter was a little tricky because we don't really know much about Kelvin Carol. What we do know in the Original Universe is that she has Kirk's kid so... Moving on, I did not wanna show them in a relationship just yet because she is obviously going through stuff and so is he, but I might make it happen down the line. As far as the question of whether or not I will talk about his long recovery, it really depends on, when I finish all the perspectives if there is still a fan presence going on or if I want to make that a sequel to this story. Long opening summary short, I would love to do a fic on his recovery, it might be a sequel, and this chapter was tough but fun. So with that, don't forget to review, follow, fave and tell your friends.**

 **And we're off:**

Carol Marcus was not having a good week. First, she snuck aboard a federation starship. Next, she found out that her dad was a psychopath. Then, he father was murdered in front of her and to top it all off, she got a broken leg and the one person she was actually connecting with, was killed.

Needless to say, she was going through some things.

The leg was fine, some quick time in the medical bay and she was good. The hardest part was, obviously, her dad.

She had had suspicions, sure. But she never assumed that the man who raised her was hell bent on starting war and would kill a starship full of people to do that. There had been some signs, especially since her mom passed, little things her and there. Signs that he was hiding things from her and maybe wasn't who he said to be.

And she ignored them. Kept telling herself lies that she eventually believed. Until she heard him practically declare himself insane to the entire crew of the USS Enterprise. That was tough.

She had tried to be brave, she really had. Tried to defend the ship the best she could. She never figured he would just teleport her out of the Enterprise. Oh, she was furious when that happened, her being teleported meant the doom of the Enterprise. Or so she thought.

When she was onboard her father's ship, she was mad. She had every right to be. And she let him know that. Until Kirk, Khan, and Scotty all came aboard guns blazing. She was surprised, but then remembered, this is James T. Kirk we are talking about here, and there are no surprises.

She listened to her dad yell at Kirk, all but telling him to kill him. Instead, Kirk did something she wasn't expecting, he was diplomatic. This man, her father, was going to kill the entire crew of his ship without a second thought, and he was just going to arrest him. And then he turned to her and asked if she was alright.

"Yes Captain." She responded. Of course he was making sure she was okay. He was Kirk.

And then Khan woke up.

She tried to yell out a warning, but it was too late. She should have been paying more attention. Should have kept an eye on Khan as well, but she didn't.

Khan and Kirk fought. Kirk was down. She tried to stop him, tried to reason with him, something, anything. And then he broke her leg. It hurt. It hurt bad. But not as bad as watching her father's skull crushed right in front of her.

She screamed and next thing she knew, Khan was broadcasting this to the Enterprise. He wanted to make a trade, but they were smart enough to know by now that he would never honor it. Jim knew this too, which is why he tried to speak up, tell Spock not to do it, only to be knocked down to the ground in a heap.

Carol looked at him sympathetically. And he winked at her.

The man was beaten and bloodied, and he just winked at her. He mouthed 'you okay?' and she nodded.

Unbelievable. He was still concerned for her more than him.

The next thing that Carol remembers is being beamed aboard the Enterprise and taken to sick bay. She was healed relatively quickly, even though there was an already enormous amount of people in there. The ship was crashing, she knew because it was going all around with equipment flying everywhere until McCoy had a chance to secure it all.

Then it stopped. The ship was fine. Then the body bag came in. She had been speechless. The man who was a strong captain a day ago was now reduced to stillness in a bag. She saw the desperation in McCoy as soon as he found out who it was. But she had also seen the hope he had when the Tribble started moving.

What seemed to be impossible, bringing the dead back to life, was possible for this one chance, this one opportunity, and she was not going to screw it up. She worked fast and in the end, after long and tense hours, they were able to bring him back.

Leave it to Jim Kirk to be too stubborn to die.

Three days after Jim was in the hospital was when Carol decided to come by for the first time. She snuck into the med room, hoping to avoid any other members of the Enterprise crew. Instead, she opened the door on a sleeping McCoy.

"Dr. Marcus." He said sleepily. "I was wondering when you were going to come and see him."

"I understand if you want me to leave, but I just wanted to see how he was doing." She said.

McCoy was taken back. "Why would I want you to leave?" He asked.

"Because my father is the reason Jim died. He was going to destroy the Enterprise! I figured that you might not want to have me around anymore, especially you."

"Now hold on a minute," McCoy said "that was your father. Not you. You had no control over his actions and you are not responsible for what he did." McCoy paused. "I don't blame you, Spock doesn't, Uhura doesn't, and Jim doesn't."

"You have no idea how good it is to hear that." She said. She looked at the bed. "How is he doing?" She asked.

"Well, for right now everything looks good, granted there are no complications. He is one stubborn son of a bitch so I have high hopes for him." McCoy glanced at Carol. "How are you doing? It hasn't been easy on us but I can't imagine what it is like for you."

"It has been tough. Not everyone has been as understanding as you are. I am either getting looks of pity or hate, doesn't seem to be an in between. I am still dealing with the loss of my father, too."

"I can imagine. Even though he was psychotic, no offense."

"To me, the minute I lost my father was the moment he was prime and ready to kill off the entire Enterprise and countless others to start a war. The man that Khan killed, he was a stranger."

McCoy sat in silence before speaking up. "He like you, you know. Jim does."

Carol blushed. "He does?"

"Yeah. I can tell by the way he looked at you. He's dated and slept with many girls during our Star Fleet years but there is something different about you. You challenge him in a way that most people don't anymore. "

"Well, he's always got you to challenge him." She said with a smile.

"Isn't that the truth? Damn fool doesn't listen to me most of the time though. Maybe he'll start listening to you. "

"Maybe."

"Well, do you like him too?" McCoy asked not afraid of being blunt.

"I think so." Carol answered. "When I first met him, I thought he was like any other captain. Being that my dad is-" Carol stopped herself "was in Star Fleet all my life, I had met most of them. But, there is something different about him. How he cares for the crew more than himself. How he willingly rushes into danger to save someone. How he makes the decisions, even when they are crazy, and has the confidence that they will work. His smile, the way that he looks at you guys with admiration even though he's the captain." She paused, smiled and looked down. "I'm blushing aren't I?"

"Brighter than a tomato." McCoy responded amused.

"When Jim died. I realized how much I cared for him. How much I wished I could have spent more time with him. How I wanted more than anything else to get to know him more. More on a personal level."

"And you still can." McCoy said. "A suggestion. When he wakes up, take that time to get to know him. I think you'll be glad you did."

"I intend to, doctor." She said gripping Jim's hand.

When she got the call from McCoy that Jim was awake a few days later, she was ecstatic. Nervous, but ecstatic. She rushed down to go see him and was amused at the sight in front of her.

Jim was sleeping with a stuffed animal next to him, and McCoy was busy taking pictures of the sight.

"Something to blackmail him with later." He said.

"Do you want me to come another time?" She asked.

"No, no. I was just about to wake him up for his medicine. He was asking about you."

"Oh really?" She said grinning.

"Yeah wouldn't shut up about you." McCoy said with a grin.

"Not true." Jim muttered from the bed.

"So you're awake then?" McCoy asked.

"Yup. We can discuss those pictures later." He said. "Doctor Marcus! It is really, really good to see you."

"Good to see you too, Jim."  
His expression turned serious. "How are you doing?"

Carol scoffed. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

"Well, I'm obviously fine, not dead anymore thanks to Spock and Uhura-"

McCoy coughed rather loudly.

"Oh yes and the Tribble!" Jim said.

"Ungrateful little-"

"Bones, would you mind leaving Doctor Marcus and I alone for a minute?" Jim asked making Carol nervous.

"Sure. You kids have fun."

"Carol," Jim began.

"Jim, I just want to say I'm sorry." Carol interrupted. "I shouldn't have snuck aboard the Enterprise and my dad and all that-"

"Is not your fault." Jim said. "I just want to make sure you are okay."

"I'm better now. Is that your new friend?" She said pointing to the stuffed animal trying to change the topic.

Jim made a face as to say 'I know what you're doing but we'll talk about it later' which Carol understood and then he smiled and said, "It was from Demy."

Carol's grin faded. "A girlfriend?"

Jim laughed. "No, nothing like that. Sulu's daughter."

Both Carol and Jim laughed and then McCoy came in.

"I'm gonna have to give him his medicine now. You can come back later if you like." He said to Carol.

"I think I will." She said turning to leave.

"Hey Doctor Marcus," Jim called out, "When I finally get out of this place, you wanna go out to eat? I know this great burger place about a mile from here if you're interested. Just as friends you know."

"Jim, call me Carol. And I would love to."

And with that, she left smiling.

 **So what did we think? Good, bad, kinda meh? Please, please, please let me know. This story is not gonna have cliffhangers or anything like that, it is just a great load of agnst so please remember that. The next chapter is probably gonna be Scotty. I want to save Uhura and Spock for later and I am extremely nervous about writing Checkov's due to Anton's passing (RIP). But for now, this is it. Please expect updates every Monday, giving me a week to write each. I will try to do it normally on Mondays, but every once and a while I might do a chapter before that.**

 **Thanks!  
~StoneyT**


	4. Scotty

**Hey y'all! I hope you enjoy this chapter! It is not my favorite per se, and I did have a little bit of a hard time writing it, but alas, it is finished. Let me know what you think in the comments and don't forget to follow or fave!**

 **And we're off:**

Scotty was drunk. Again. Although, could you really blame him? Surprisingly, he only had a few good friends since joining the Enterprise, and seeing one of them in a body bag did not sit well with him. He knew that he was not the blame for what happened, but if he had only he had stopped that damn punch.

When Scotty saw that the core was not aligned he thought that all hope was lost. There was no way that the both of them would make that climb and still be alive. He was assuming 'we' because Jim would not be stupid enough to go in there by himself would he?

Yes. Yes he would. And because of Scotty not being able to stop himself getting knocked out by Jim Kirk, he had gone in there by himself and saved the whole damn ship. Of course he did.

When Scotty first joined the Enterprise, he did not think in a million years that he would begin to fit in there. As soon as he got on the bridge Spock was questioning him, and he did not even want to know the strings that Jim pulled to get him and Keenser to stay aboard the Enterprise.

But eventually, he had fit in. He and Jim were growing friends, as well as his relationship with some of the other crewmates. But do to the fact that he spent over a year isolated on an ice planet, he was a little bad with his people skills. People considered him a great drinking buddy, but while he was sober, he focused on the Enterprise.

So when he saw Jim in that room almost dead, he initially had no idea how to react. He tried to get out of his seat, he found that he was not able to, and then he realized, Jim had taken the time to buckle him in. Un-freaking-believable. The man was going to his certain death, and he takes the time to make sure that Scotty is buckled into his seat.

The first thing Scotty could think to do was contact Spock. He was the ship's first commander and all. He should know what to do. After he called him down he stood to wait for him. He prepared a little speech about how there was nothing that he could have done, but seeing Spock, the Vulcan with that look of terror on his face, made him only capable of shaking his head.

"Open the door."

Scotty explained to him why he couldn't. 'Don't you think I would have done it if I could of?' He thought.

He stood by and watched as Spock said goodbye to his friend for supposedly the last time. He watched as the Vulcan, who doesn't show emotion, start crying. That was what made him crack. And then Jim Kirk died. He felt someone next to him but couldn't look over. Instead he only looked at the body of his dead captain.

His dead friend.

He tried to show up at the hospital to give his support. He really did try. But seeing Jim there, so still and pale and McCoy looking so desperate and tired, reminded him of all the grief and guilt he was feeling. He left quickly. He said a promise about coming back if his condition changed, and then left.

That had been six days ago. Now he got the call that Jim Kirk was awake and was asking about him. So he did what any friend would do and came.

He knocked tentatively on the door to Jim's room.

"Scotty!" He yelled. 'He looks so alive.' Scotty thought.

'Because he is.'

"I've been waiting to see you!" Jim said sitting up. "First of all, how is the face?" Jim asked.

"Pardon me, sir?" Scotty asked perplexed.

"Well I hit you pretty good. Scared I might have damaged you." He said with a grin.

This earned a scoff from McCoy who was reading on the chair next to Jim's bed.

"What? I pack a good punch sometimes. I just wanted to make sure I didn't do any damage." Jim said defensively.

"Captain-"Scotty began.

"Please drop the formalities Scotty we are not on board the Enterprise." Kirk said.

"Fine then." Scotty said. "Jim. Are you out of your mind? You are seriously asking me how my face is. You died Jim! You died right in front of me and there was nothing I could do to stop it! You bastard!"

McCoy politely excused himself from the room. "I think you two have some talking to do." He said to a stunned Jim and a yelling Scotty.

"Scotty, I had to do it. To save the ship. I couldn't let all those people die. You know that."

Scotty sighed. "Yes. I know that. Does not mean I have to like it. I just, I feel guilty for you doing it Jim. I am the engineer, I should have gone in there, not you."

"That is bull." Jim said. "I am the captain of the ship. If anyone is going to die saving her, it is gonna be me. Besides, who would have taken care of her when we got back if you had died. There is no way I am letting someone else fix this ship." Jim said with a smile. "No one knows her as well as you do."

"I appreciate that Jim. That doesn't mean that I like you going and dying to save the ship."

"You don't have to like it. I am the captain and I would rather die than see you or anyone else get hurt on my ship. Besides, who else is gonna look after Keenser? I need you for the ship, Scotty. No one else. So will you officially come back?"

"You bet your ass I will. Under one condition." Scotty said grinning.

"What's that?"

"Try not to die again? You are one of the only people I can tolerate on this ship."

"Deal." Jim said smiling.

"Deal." Scotty replied.

"So," Scotty said, "what is the deal with you and Doctor Marcus?" Scotty asked playfully.

"What do you mean?" Kirk asked.

"I saw the way you two look at each other." Scotty said this time grinning ear to ear.

"Oh yeah?" Jim said seeing his look, "What is the deal with you and Keenser? I've seen the way _you two_ look at each other.

"Jim! We are nothing but friends and you know that!" Scotty said.

"What is going on in here? I come back to find the both of you yelling." McCoy said with a fresh cup of coffee. "He is supposed to maintain low blood pressure."

"It is fine Bones." Jim said.

"Jim was trying to tell me that something was going on between me and Keenser. Can you believe it?"

"Well..." McCoy said.

Scotty threw his hands up. "You are both wee children! I will not be treated this way."

He put a smile on his face and walked out the door, happy that things were back to normal. Well, as normal as they could on the Enterprise.

 **Poor Scotty. :) Like I said, definetly not my best, but it shall do. Next week is going to be Checkov and I am going to be incredibly missing Anton while I write it. Please show your love in the reviews and follow or fave cause it really really helps with the writing process. A thanks to all that already have! Y'all are the best!**

 **~Jess**


	5. Checkov

**First and foremost, the biggest and most sincere apology for taking this long to update. I just got so distracted with very thing going on. I am trying to get back to normal. Here is Chrckov's chapter. I wanted it to be light and nice. I hope you all enjoy!**

To say that Jim was just a captain to Checkov was a severe understatement. Checkov viewed him as a mentor, someone he wanted to be when he grew up. He was only 17 of course.

When he was first put on the Enterprise, he had no idea what to expect. He was the youngest one there, and not everyone was appreciative of that fact. Being a young foreign prodigy can get lonely sometimes. But when Checkov joined the crew of the Enterprise, he found something that he wasn't expecting- a family.

He looked up to all the people on board the ship, but mainly to Kirk. Kirk was a big brother to him, someone who would talk with him when he needed to talk and joke with him when he was getting too stressed out about life. He gave him advice and told him not to worry about what other people on the ship were saying about him.

So when he died, it hit him _hard_.

At first he didn't want to believe it. How could the captain be dead? He was the captain for goodness sakes. He had seen him come back from things that normal people don't come back from. In Checkov's mind, he was invisible. So there must be some mistake.

But there wasn't one. He was really dead.

Until he wasn't. To say that Checkov was thrilled to find out that he was alive is another understatement. He was ecstatic. Once he found out, he really didn't want to leave Kirk's side. He would stop by the hospital every day to talk to McCoy and find out how he was doing. That was until of course, McCoy kicked him out. So when he got the call that Kirk was awake, he came running.

"I'm here! I'm here!" Checkov yelled as he ran into Kirk's room. "Is the captain awake?"

"Geeze, kid you're gonna wake up everyone on this floor." McCoy said. But there was something different about the way he said it, Checkov noticed. When he had last been to the hospital, McCoy seemed drained, but now he had a new energy around him.

"Sorry, sir. I'm just excited."

"We all are. He just fell back asleep. I can get him up in ten minutes for another dose of his medicine if you can wait that long." McCoy said.

"I can wait! I can wait!"

Checkov waited, but not patiently. McCoy can't be mad at the kid though, he knows how excited he was to finally see Jim again. When the time finally comes for Jim to wake up, McCoy is glad, because he's honestly not sure how much more of Checkov's anxious waiting he can take without getting anxious himself.

When he wakes Jim up, Checkov is already there.

"Captain!" Checkov says with joy.

"Hey Checkov!" Jim says sleepily. "Nice to see you."

"It is good to see you are okay Captain!" He said. "Me and the rest of the crew were worried."

"No need to be, you know I'm invisible."

Checkov laughs, and McCoy can't help but grin as well. Seeing Jim act as the 'big brother' makes him so incredibly happy inside, not that he would ever admit it.

"So captain, I had a question for you about modifications to the Enterprise."

"Fire away."

McCoy drifts off as the two of them talk about the Enterprise's inner workings. He never really understood the technical aspect of it, it was never his job. But it still gave him joy to see Jim in his natural element. McCoy gives Jim his dose as the two continue talking about gadgets and gizmos. McCoy stopped and looked when the talkig stopped.

Both Jim and Checkov stood staring at the other until Jim spoke. "Pavel... that's genius."

"Thank you captain." Checkov responded with his head down and cheeks flush.

"No I mean this is incredible," Jim let out a laugh, "your idea could improve the energy levels of the ship and get it running smoother. I mean yeah there might be something kinks but... you're a genius."

"I was waiting to run the idea PST you before I brought it up to any on else, captain." He said.

"Go publish that and get it in place." Jim ran his hand through his hair. McCoy could see the paleness in his face and made the quick deduction that his animated chat with Checkov left him more tired than he wanted the young man to know. McCoy seeing this, decided it was I'm to give him a break.

"Well gentlemen, as much as I would love to stay here and listen to more of your mumbo jumbo, Jim needs to nap."

"But we were having fun!" Jim stubbornly protests.

"I would listen to the doctor, caption. He knows what he's doing." Checkov states.

"Really?" Jim asks. "Most of the time I think he's guessing." He adds with a smile.

"That I am..." McCoy mumbles.

"Before I go, I wanted to tell you something." Checkov says to Kirk.

"What is it?" He asks.

"I wanted to you to know, something. Back in Russia, it was mainly my mom and me. My father worked all the time. I had a lonely life, but ever since the Enterprise, everything changed. You treat me like a little brother and I see you as my big bother. I just wanted you to know how much you meant to me."

Jim stared at Checkov for a minute, surprised at the confession. "I... I'm honored. Thank you Checkov . I'll try to live up to that title."

"You already have, captian." And with that, he leaves.

 **Nice, sweet, and simple short little chapter. Don't worry, Checkov will be back. Not sure he yet, but he will. Don't forget to follow, fave, and review!**


	6. Uhura

She refused to see him. She knew it was dumb, but she still couldn't bring herself to come. The fact of the matter is, Uhura is not commonly wrong. But if there was ever one thing she was so massively wrong about, it was James T. Kirk.

When she had first seen him, he was nothing but a low life drunk. When he went into Starfleet, she was making bets on how long it took him to drop out. Needless to say, she was not a fan.

He was just another impulsive, reckless, unmature cadet that wanted to sleep with every girl he laid eyes on. But boy was she wrong. (Well, only about the unmature part. The rest is pretty true.)

When Jim first became captain of the Enterprise, she didn't like it. Not at all. Sure she had a better relationship with him now than when they were both cadets, but she still couldn't get over her impression of him. But then, over time, she found herself warning up to him. She noticed the way he cared about the crew, learned about the ship, and the people on it. She noticed how smart he actually was, and in the end, was proud to have him as her captain. She even started liking him as a person, enjoying his ompany when she needed to vent (having a Vulcan as a boyfriend is more challenging than it seems.)

But then there was Khan. The impact it had on all of them, Pike's death, Marcus's betrayal, she thought it couldn't get any worse.

It did. Jim died. Seeing him dead behind the glad was something that rocked her to get core. How could she be so wrong about a person? In that instant, all she felt was guilt. She continued feeling it, until she heard there was a chance to bring him back.

Now that he was back, she should be jumping up and down to go see him, but she just can't. She can't see him, recovering from death after she judged him for all those years. After she saw him sacrifice himself for everyone on the whole ship. She just couldn't.

But she does anyway. MCoy calls her, tells her that Jim's awake and he looks like he'll make a full recovery. He's asking to see her. How can she say no? She can't. So she goes.

She knocks quietly on Jim's door and let's herself in. She sees Jim in bed reading while McCoy plays on the tablet next to him.

"Uhura!" Jim greets as she walks in. "Captain."she nods.

Jim is taken back by the formal greeting, and the two just stare at each other. "Well... " McCoy says, "I'm gonna go get some coffee. I'll be back when things aren't awkward. " He gets up and leaves the two of them by themselves.

"So..." Jim asks, "how have you been?"

"How have I been?" She asks, "You're the one who died."

"Well, I'm better now obviously."

"But still." She responded defeated.

"Bones told me you didn't visit. I'm not being judgmental or anything, I just want to know why. Is there something I did to offend you?" He asks nervously anticipating the answer.

Instead of getting an answer, she just looks at him. "Are you serious?" She asks. " You know, for someone as smart as you, you're pretty dumb."

"Uh... should I be offended or flattered by that?"

"Both. Look Jim, the reason why I didn't visit is because I was wrong, and I am not usually wrong."

Jim was suddenly very very confused. "Wrong about what?" He asked.

"About you."

"Oh..."

"But I think I got it now."

"And who exactly am I ?" He asked.

"I'm not sure yet." She admitted. "I guess I'll have to stay on board the Enterprise to find out."

He smiled. "I look forward to that."

"Good." She said as she turned around and walked out the door.

* * *

She visited him two days later. She walked in to the room only to be shushed by McCoy.

"He's asleep. " He whispered. "For the first time in twelve hours. Let's go out here." He said opening the door for the both of them.

"Is he okay?" She asked.

"Him? Yeah he's fine. Just tired all the time and with all the visitors he's been getting he doesn't want to nap."

"Sounds like Jim." She smiled.

"Unfortunately yes. I wish the dang fool would take a second and think about his health. I'm going to die of Street by forty."

"If he did that in the first place we wouldn't be here." Uhura said pointingly.

"Don't I know it."

"Seriously though. " She asked. "Is he gonna be okay?"

McCoy sighed. "I can't guarantee there won't be side effects. Long lasting things. Maybe he gets tied easier, more prone to be sick, I don't know. I plan on waiting it out and whatever happens I can deal with. But... yeah I think he'll be okay."

"We'll help him." She said determined, "all of us."

"I count on it." McCoy said.


	7. Spock

Spock had a hard time managing his emotions. He knew Jim was someone who he respected, who he held in high regards, but he never thought of him as a friend, that is, he never admitted it to himself. When he watched him die, something had snapped inside of him. The emotions that he spent so long trying to repressed swam their way to the surface into a bubbling rage. He did the first thing he could think of - he went for revenge. It was illogical, but at that point in time he didn't care. He wanted Khan to pay. For some reason alien to him he wants Khan to pay, and he didn't necessarily care how he did it.

When Uhura first came down and told him to stop, he didn't want to. He wants to continue bashing in Khan' s brain until he felt the same fear Jim did right before he died. But then he heard that they could save him, that there still was a chance, so he took it. And it paid off. It had been a tricky first few days, but soon Doctor McCoy was able to tell him that Jim has a fighting chance and he had felt a weight lift off his shoulders. He was finally able to think rationally again.

He visited Jim a lot during those days. He wanted to see with his own eyes that he was okay. Logically he knew that McCoy would tell him if something happened, but he wasn't thinking logically. After Jim first woke up, his visits lessened. He was in the hospital cafeteria when he ran into McCoy a couple days after Jim woke up.

"Doctor." Spock said seeing him checking out with a coffee in his hand.

McCoy looked up and smiled. "Didn't expect to see you here, Spock." Street setting the confused and perhaps betrayed look on Spock' s face, he backtracked. "I thought Star Fleet would be having you buried under a pile of paperwork."

"Thankfully since the captain has made his recovery I only have to do a few pages worth." He stated matter of fact making McCoy smile.

"Now Spock, was that an attempt at a joke that I just heard?"

"An attempt, yes."

McCoy put his arm around the man's shoulders. "I do believe," he said smiling, that our young captain is beginning to influence your sense of humour.

McCoy led Spock back to Jim's room. "You can stay with him for a while of you want. I've got to go home for a little bit. I haven't had a shower in a week."

Before Spock could even protest McCoy was out the door. He walked into Jim's room and found him asleep. Spock uncomfortably sat in the chair next to him. Seeing Jim like this brought up memories of him dying. Shock focused on the rise and fall of his chest.

Spock had to admit something, something he hoped that when he asked would make him return to thinking logically. "Captain... Jim." he began. "I believe that I have failed you... as second in command, and as a friend. I have not had many friends, but I swear to you that I will try to do better. We may not have always been friends, but now I shall forever be yours." Spock looked satisfied with what he said and looked down at Jim again. "Now if you'll excuse me for a moment captain, I do have some paperwork I need to fill out. "

If Spock hadn't of been so busy trying but to focus on Jim, and instead work on his work, he might have seen the young captain's lips turn up in a tiny smile before going normal again.


	8. Finale

"Damn it Jim slow down. I'm a doctor not a track runner. McCoy said as Jim was hurridly packing all of his stuff into his backpack.

"Bones," he said pausing and looking up. "I have been in this hospital room for years-"

"Its only been a couple weeks you baby." McCoy interrupted.

"Like I said, years. I am ready to go home and get the hell out of this place."

McCoy put his hand over heart in feigned hurt. "You telling me your not going to miss me naggin you all the time? "

"Not one bit." Jim said winking. "Okay I'm all packed. Can we go? "

"Hold on there cowboy. I'm still waiting on someone."

Jim gave him an irritated look. "Who could you possibly be - oh you have got to be kidding me." He said as Scotty appeared in the doorway with a dekked out wheelchair. Jim looked at Bones in utter disbelief. " Are you serious? Come on! "

"Sorry captain. Doctor's orders." Scotty said looking at his captain. "I did some wee modifications to make it more fun for ye."

Jim held up a finger indictating Scotty to stop talking. " Hang on there. " he turned to McCoy. " Do I look like I need a freaking wheelchair. I am perfectly fine."

"Need I remind you that you were clinically dead? By some miracle you are alove and I am not going to chance that by havin you over exert yourself. This is not exacly a studied science you know." McCoy finished his rant and looked at Jim with pleading eyes.

"I was only barely dead. " Jim muttered as he stood up with his backpack. McCoy tried to help him walk to the chair, but Jim refused his help. He slumped down in the chair and looked at him. " You coming? " Jim asked.

"Be there in a second. Scotty go ahead and head towards the car."

"Yes sir. " Scotty said putting his fingers to his head in salute. " All right las let me show you what I added." He said pushing Jim out of the room.

McCoy grinned as the pair left with Jim and Scotty babbling as he looked around the room. He let out a sigh as he saw the cleaned off shelves, the turned off machines, and most importantly, the empty bed. He had barely left his room in the last couple weeks, and had spent each moment in a constant state of worry. His friend is finally healthy enough to leave, and the thought fills him with joy.

As much as he began to hate this room, he also began to like it. Although the weeks had been hard for him and everyone close to him and Jim, he had gotten a chance to bond with the Enterprise crew in ways he never thought he could have. He learned about their families, their backgrounds, their guilt, insecurities, all of it. All of it because they were worried about some daredevil kid from Iowa who is too sacrifical for his own good, much to the annoyance of his doctor.

 _Speaking of the kid_ McCoy thought, he was restless to get out of here, so he shouldn't keep him waiting. McCoy took one last look and turned off the lights. By the time he had gotten to the lobby, Jim and Scotty were busy playing with the new features on the wheelchair. Jim pushed a button and the thing started moving at a speed that was hard for Jim to control.

" Jim wait! " Scotty yelled as the wheelchair zoomed past him and some frightened nurses. " Push the green button! " He yelled running after him. "Push the damn button! "

Jim finally pushed the button he was talking about and the wheelchair came to a stop, Scotty running up along side Jim panting.

"That was so awesome." Jim said.

McCoy had the sudden feeling that if his friendship continued with Jim, he would definelty see the hospital lobby again. But for some crazy and unknown reason, Jim was worth it. Their friendship was worth it.

 _Do not go gentle into that good night,_ _Old age should burn and rave at close of day;_ _Rage, rage against the dying of the light._ _Though wise men at their end know dark is right,_ _Because their words had forked no lightning they_ _Do not go gentle into that good night._ _Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright_ _Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,_ _Rage, rage against the dying of the light._ _Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,_ _And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,_ _Do not go gentle into that good night._ _Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight_ _Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,_ _Rage, rage against the dying of the light._ _And you, my father, there on the sad height,_ _Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray._ _Do not go gentle into that good night._ _Rage, rage against the dying of the light._

 _~Dyalan Thomas 1914-1953~_

 _ **The End**_

 **We have officially reached the end! Thank you for all the reviews, each one of them has provided an inspiration to keep writing. This has truely been an incredible and experience, and I am happy that Jim can finally go explore the stars with his motly crew behind him.**

 **It does not need to be said that I do not own Star Trek or any characters associated with it. But I'll say it for legal thingies anyway.**

 **Thanks guys!**

 **~Stoney T**


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